A Naughty Bit of Crumpet

Jennifer Aniston is hot. And, apparently, cold. And still very easy on the eye-bulbs.

Is It Just Me?

We all daydream, right? Ever have that one where you're galloping along...

...leading a band of blood-crazed horsemen through a village, and you watch in amusement as some wretch stumbles from the burning ruin of his hut before you run him through, adding your spear to the three already protruding from his back, staring with grim satisfaction as his pathetic, useless life burbles away in the dirt?

Or is it just me?

I had this very vision after I read a few of the comments made on another blog concerning a post about the court martial of the three Navy SEALs charged with failing to safeguard a prisoner. (The charges, by the way, are complete dreck, and hopefully will be dismissed without incident.)

This particular wretch is not only fully convinced of the SEALs guilt, he demands the "so-called soldiers" (which is utterly clueless: SEALs are Navy, not Army, and therefore not soldiers) be punished to the full extent of the law. In addition, he believes our military is made up entirely of loose cannons that should be expected to kowtow to whatever ridiculous regulations the international community lays down; as a final flourish, he also believes that each military unit should have a "political officer", answerable only to the president, permanently embedded, to make sure said regulations are strictly adhered to by our forces.

I'm not kidding. He said that. Look here.

Political officers in military units. Hmm. Wonder how that would work out?

I'm guessing it would work out very much like it did in the Red Army during WWII, where each unit was assigned a commissar, a political officer that had the authority to execute any soldier he deemed was lacking in proper party attitude. You know, the guys who set up machine guns behind their own lines, not for the purpose of killing the enemy, but to gun down any soldier that tried to run, even if they were being over-run and had a legitimate excuse to retreat? Remember those guys? And this absolute fuck thinks that would be a good idea for the American military.

Hence my vision.

I'm starting to think I should have let my reverie go on a bit longer. I hope I didn't miss myself braining him with an axe while he writhed in the mud...

From the Sports Desk

I know you're all wondering, so I'd like to fill you in and let you know that my beloved Blackhawks are currently kicking major ass in the NHL.

Which is good news for Chicago fans, because the Bears are sucking major ass in the NFL.

I Shouldn't Have To Do This....

...but I will anyway. Judging from some snarky comments and the political and social bent of a few prowlers around Constantine's Sidearm, it's time to clear a few things up. Again. And for the last time.

The posts here at the Sidearm can be volatile. They can be angry, amused, disgusted, appalled, shocked: fill in whatever adjective is most appropriate to a particular post. They are the thoughts and opinions of myself and Ranger Steve, and we have a First Amendment right to express them. We will continue to do so. But to address a few bullet points:

I am not a racist. While race can certainly be a factor in many of the issues we post, it is never the defining factor. I could truly care less what color a person's skin is: a good person is a good person, and an asshole is an asshole. That's a simple truth. Another simple truth is that the race card is usually played by the people for whom it is supposed to be a detriment: certain people in the black community. Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton are two of the worst offenders. They bring race into every issue they possibly can, whether it is relevant or not. And that does neither side any good. You can name any racial slur you want, and the sad fact is this: you will very often find a reasonable example of why that particular stereotype persists. The other side of that coin is this: it only applies to a very small portion of that community. And no community is immune. White, Black, Hispanic, Asian...we all have our crackers, niggers, spics, and chinks that are, and should be, a complete embarrassment to us all. (For the record, I find the use of the word "cracker" as applied to a white person EVERY BIT as offensive as using "nigger" to refer to a black person.)
It is truly unfortunate that there are still people of all colors that continue to see a person's skin as the defining quality of that person. That makes absolutely no sense to me. If I meet someone at a party who happens to be black, of course my initial reaction is going to be, "Here's a black guy" for the same reason his initial reaction is going to be "Here's a white guy": it's the most obvious and convenient way for us to reference each other. But when we shake hands and exchange names, he ceases to be "the black guy" and becomes "Chuck", or "Stan" or "Willie" or whatever. Then, if through the course of the evening, I find I dislike him, I tell one of my other friends "That Chuck guy is an asshole", not "That black guy is an asshole". Conversely, if we like each other, I introduce him as "Chuck", not "Chuck the black guy".
Which brings me to my ultimate point on this: racism is lazy. A person's skin color should never matter, because if we could all look past it, we'd find far more legitimate reasons to like or dislike someone.
I don't believe in the ideas of racial purity, either, or any of the other Neo-Nazi crap about race floating around these days. That's about as ignorant as it gets. Which brings me to my second point:

Constantine's Sidearm is unabashedly Pro-Israel. They have been, and still very much are, one of America's most trusted and important allies. The Hussein administration should think long and hard about alienating them further. The Islamists and other knuckleheads can think of them as the "Evil Juice" all they want: it just shows the depths of their ignorance.

Point Three: Constantine's Sidearm is fully and unabashedly Anti-Islam. Why? Because Islam is so very much anti-everything-but-islam. They do not, nor have they ever, practiced a live-and-let-live motto. They spread their "religion" only through violence. They speak through both sides of their mouths as a habit when dealing with "infidels", as we are not worthy of proper recognition in their eyes. They are the first to insult, defame, admonish, or threaten other faiths, and they are also the first to cry foul when others dare to object to islam. They do not desire peace for any longer than it takes their shattered armies to regroup, at which point they will attack again. History is full of examples to support all of these statements: look them up. Islam is the true enemy of Freedom, and as an American that offends me to my core. Thus my extreme attitude.

So there you have it. A good portion of this post was directed, as I said, at certain prowlers around the Sidearm, so if you're a regular I apologize for the semi-rant. But I felt it was time to get some things in order.

Now that I've cleared things up, I can get back to bashing the marxist twits who are trying to sell my country out to the Reds and the islamofascists.

And by the way: Merry Christmas to everyone!

A Little Something for the AP

The Associated Press has been caught red-handed doctoring a photo for a press release on the Climate Conference. The organization took a black and white picture of a coal plant and added all sorts of ominous orange color to it, making it seem like Hell's Own Smokestack was spewing sulfur into the air.

Trouble is, they did a lousy job of it. A good friend of the Sidearm, who has worked in the field of image manipulation for 20 years, noticed the inconsistencies and blew the proverbial whistle. Since then, the story has snowballed all over the internet, and the AP has been directly challenged.

So, kudos to our buddy Drudge Potato Al! Keep up the good work!

As for the AP, I'd say shame on them, but it appears they have none left.

I'm at a Loss for An Appropriate Title

I find myself in yet another quandary. The subject of this post has me wavering between absolute disgust, as a rational human being, and blood-boiling rage, as a parent, coach, and mentor of youth.

Kevin Jennings, Hussein's "Safe School Czar", has been making quite the headlines over recent days. The truth is coming out as to what really goes on in the GLSEN (Gay, Lesbain, and Straight Education Network) founder's brain (the gentlemen over at Founding Bloggers have already done an outstanding job chronicling them, so check out their posts concerning Czar Jennings).

A rational response has already been posted over at SPQA.org.

Now, for the blood-boiling-rage-type response:

Why the fuck is this disgusting freak in any sort of position to influence children?

The lunatic left would have you believe its all under the guise of promoting a safe environment for gay kids to go to school, i.e., to stop "bullying".

I believe that is total bullshit. The real reason is that GLSEN and other organizations like it want to promote their own radical agenda in the hopes of mainstreaming their perversions.

Newsflash, Queer Nation: most of the people in this country are straight and don't want to hear about your sexual preferences.

Now, I am not a prude by any means. As long as it involves consenting adults and closed doors, pick your freak and get it on. It's none of my business, and shouldn't be anyone else's business, either. But when you throw open those doors, and start promoting those freaks to barely pubescent or pre-pubescent children, you are way the fuck out of line.

One pamphlet in particular was handed out at a meeting of Jennings' organization, where children were present by design. The booklet covered such things as fisting, rimming, swallowing, "water sports", and "mutual jerking off". And they were floating around, for anyone to pick up and read, at an event where children were bussed in to attend.

So let me ask this: if a 16-year-old boy can be charged with possession of child pornography for the naked picture his 16-year-old girlfriend sent to his phone...how is this GLSEN bullshit not promoting child pornography? At the very least it could very easily be seen as contributing to the delinquency of a minor, which, last time I checked, is a crime.

Utter bullshit, made possible by the Hussein Administration. Fine fuckin' job, there, Bammy, you ignorant prick.

As for Jennings, he's a sack of shit, and needs to be fired yesterday. If I ever see any of this GLSEN shit at any of the schools my kids attend, the school boards are going to be confronted with one pissed-off daddy, and that will not be pleasant...for them.

I Never Liked Him Anyway

Not a big fan of Tiger Woods. Never have been, even less so now. Being an old-fashioned kind of guy, cheaters piss me off, especially married ones. I hope Woods get taken to the cleaners by Elin, and crashes and burns in disgrace.

Given the median intelligence of the average person and the way sports stars are worshipped, I doubt this will happen, but it's my blog, so don't harsh my buzz.

I wonder how long jagweeds like Jackson and Sharpton will take to turn this into a racial issue? He had to be steppin' out because his white wife didn't really understand him, right? Or, maybe, its because Woods is a selfish, cheating bastard.

I am officially changing Tiger's name. He will henceforth be known as Horn-Dog Woods. Check out the latest list of his reputed philanderings here. This one goes to 11.

And Now This...

It's cold and windy, with snow on the ground and more to come here at the Sidearm. So in the interest of getting the jump on the winter blues, your humble host in the spectral armor provides you with this little dose of sunshine.

You're quite welcome.

This Guy is Nuts...N-V-T-S, Nuts!

Iranian President Malmouth Ahmydinnerjacket is claiming that the United States is purposefully thwarting the return of "Mahdi", the imam that muslims claim to be their savior. Or, as we Christians and Jews of the Western World like to call him, "the Anti-Christ".

So, with that in mind, I would like to state for the record that I certainly fucking hope America is doing everything she can to cancel that flight.

The Devil is real, folks. He exists, and is one tricky SOB; the last thing we need in the world right now is some devil-spawn raghead running around trying to knock the already unhinged followers of islam completely out of whack.

But Ol' Malmouth is looking for his return, so Iran can be the focal point for a global sharia. Whether the rest of us want it or not. But it's all in the name of the "religion of peace", right?

Story here.

You Know How the Liberals Love Their Polls?

Well, I wonder what they'll make of the latest Gallup poll: Hussein's approval rating currently stands at 47%.

47%. That's the lowest ever for any president at this point in his term.

Seems Mr. Hopenchange has been Mr. Smokenmirrors all along.

"Ignore that man behind the curtain! The Great and Powerful O commands it!"

A few other numbers the lib-twits might be interested in are the approval ratings of the three previous presidents at the same point in their terms:

George H. W. Bush: 71%
Slick Willy Clin-Ton: 52%
George W. Bush: 86%

The last two Dems averaged a 49.5% approval rating to this point.
The last two Republicans averaged a 78.5% approval rating to this point.

In poll-speak, that a plus/minus rating of +29% in favor of the GOP. Which, in margin-of-victory terms, is a sound ass-kicking.

Hussein sucks big time. Who knew?

Full story here.

CSHOD for 12/7/09

Harry Reid (Dumbass-Nowheresville) takes the scheisskopf honors in a landslide. We might even have to add outhouse clusters to the award for the sheer level of crap oozing out of Reid's orifice.

The sanctimonious fuckjacker declared in a statement on the Senate floor that Republicans who oppose Hussein's BFI-HC are akin to the lawmakers who clung to slavery over a century ago. He went on to add opposition to women's suffrage and the civil rights movement to the comparison.

A spokestwit for Reid, one Jim Manley, said the office stands by the remarks, and that Republicans have "done nothing but obstruct health care". Of course that's true, because Obamacare is the stupidest fucking idea since the theory of global warming.

Typical liberal bullshit. Can't admit to a bad idea, refuse to see the complete lack of logic behind their defense of a bad idea, lie brazenly and obviously about the cost of a bad idea, and when called on it, strike back with vile and offensive accusations they would never tolerate being leveled at themselves.

Tom Coburn (R-Okla), said he was personally insulted by the remarks and felt that the remarks were "beneath the dignity of the majority leader". I too am insulted, but I disagree that the comments are beneath Reid's dignity. Reid has absolutely no dignity to begin with: therefore, nothing can be beneath it.

Story here.

Never Forget

Today is the 68th anniversary of the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor. We must never forget.

We must also never forget to learn from the past: when our nation is attacked, by anyone, of any nation or religion, they must be dealt with quickly, harshly, and brutally, until they beg for mercy. Maybe if Hussein the Idiot and all of the foolish, ignorant, and asinine politicians that support him would realize that, our troubles in Iraq and Afghanistan would be over much sooner.