Hardly a Surprise

I'm back, after a long weekend of youth sports. Building Character and Class, in exactly the same way Hussein didn't when he was a child. I bet my daughter could strike him out.

So I'm flipping through the paper this morning, while eating my oatmeal and raisin toast, which I had only because my kids ate the rest of the mini chocolate donuts. I come across the lead article for the Chicago Tribune's "Live!" section, which is about zombies. I'm disappointed in two ways.

First, with a lead article like that, I think it would have been much more clever, just for today, to rename the section "Dead!". But, being clever, that would have confused a lot of people, so maybe they were just playing it safe.

The article itself is nothing big: it just talks about the growing popularity of all things Zombie. Zombie books, zombie movies, zombie bowling parties, zombie parades...the "zombie zeitgeist". The article dubs this year as the Year of the Zombies.

Well, considering the marxist bastard we have in the Oval Office, that's hardly surprising. An anti-American muslim gets elected, and it's news that there's a surge of mindless corpses taking to the streets? Not really; they're probably just ACORN shills still looking for the brains they were promised in exchange for their votes.

But that's not the second disappointing thing about the article. Let's face it, Hussein disappoints on an exponentially larger scale, so we can put that aside for the moment. The second thing, the more disturbing thing about the article, is that nowhere does it mention the Zombie drink...no picture, no recipe, nothing. I'm choosing to interpret this as another example of the pussification of America. Oh, the article mentions pub crawls, but BFD. Any self-respecting drunk should have the dignity to at least get on his feet and stumble to the next bar. A timeless, classic drink, tailor made for this "zeitgeist", goes unrequited. How boorish. How pathetic. How totally off the mark. How...Nobama-ish.

And hey, think about this...

O-B-A-M-A.............Z-O-M-B-I-E.............

those words are eerily similar, wouldn't you say?

For the record, here's how to make a Zombie:

1 oz. light rum
1/2 oz. Creme de Almond
1 1/2 oz. Sweet and Sour
1/2 oz. triple sec
1 1/2 oz. orange juice
1/2 oz. 151 proof rum

Shake all ingredients except 151 rum together with ice. Strain into a Collins glass filled with ice. Float 151 rum on top. Add cherry if desired.